Old conversations (poems)

​Old conversation

Like tendrils of black smoke come billowing up from nowhere

“How can I bring shame on this family? You have a gay son.”

Are the words messing with me tonight.
Bits of rage and hurt and disjointing feelings

Wrapped up in the answer that says, I’m not enough. I’ll never be enough

This shame that wasn’t mine 

The secret pity you should have saved

I could die in the last hole of hell

Adorned and betrothed to scarlet letters plenty

And still be ten times the man you wished you had been
Old conversations as dead as my love and devotion are to you